Filler

I miss making music so much. I went through some old photos from those prime years of Divide the Skies. I miss all the different venues, I miss my amazing friends who supported my love with their time and their money, I miss my bros from the band (yes, all of them), but most of all, I miss giving my heart in a way that only creating something can do.

I've found God in such a huge way this summer I can't even explain. If I could have this spirituality with all the music going on with some summer trips sprinkled in, I could be having the summer of my life. That is not the case, though I am enjoying the time I am being blessed with.

I feel the joy of expressing your creation that I feel when I sing and play on stage is similar on a smaller level to what God feels when we are interacting with Him. To love your creation so much and to just be with it is fantastic. I could never fathom His pure joy.

John Butler Trio - Ocean (live) on youtube in the background. Fantastic song.

So this is just a little update to say that I miss music like none other. This is also me saying that when I see the world and all the good and bad, I am forced to the conclusion that I will never be the greatest vocalist. I will never be the best guitar player. I will never be the best pitcher. I will never be the smartest human being. I will never be the best looking guy in the world. I will not be the best husband. Nor will I be the best father.
All that I could be will be overshadowed in one way or another. But you know what I can give that no one else can give in the same way? I can give a passion like no one has ever seen. That will be my gift through grace. I pray that my passions ignite the fire inside of this world in honor and glory to He who deserves it.

some lyrics I wrote a few months back:

I Won’t Write the Finale

Someday death will be just a memory

I find myself slipping again. Break this cycle.
Doubt fills me, I am a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind.
Don’t let me fall, please don’t let me fall.
I want to close my eyes and feel your presence; stand in awe at the throne.

I need to breathe in a new mentality
I need to seek more than I can grasp
I need to lose my trust in me
I need to fall into your Love

I’ve held these treasures dear.
Moth and rust will overcome them all; there will be nothing after this.
But love will flourish, love will continue
I’m coming back to the place where I feel whole again.

I need to breathe in a new mentality
I need to seek more than I can grasp
I need to lose my trust in me
I need to fall into your Love

Someday death will be just a memory

Take me to that place
Take me away
Take me to that place
Make me whole

Desperately, I need grace.

Someday death will be just a memory


*This is the first entry in which I forgot to tell you, reader that I love you. This edit is here to reverse that error. The time you take to read my thoughts is time that you are loving me in one way or another. For that, I give you thanks and pray you recognize daily your blessings.